Wednesday, December 30, 2015

First at Home Attempt

We did our first at home attempt today.  I really thought it'd be easier than it was, but all in all, we got it done.  I think the timing was bad though.  When we ordered our sperm I really thought it'd get here yesterday but I was just being dumb and not thinking. I feel that yesterday was the day to do it and that today was a bit too late but oh well we did it anyway.  We ordered online a bunch of speculum and needless syringes and instead cups.  So we first got some of the preseed in the syringe and then the sperm and then a tiny bit more preseed and then did my best to get it close to the cervix but I've never used a speculum before and I've never looked for a cervix before so it was all just a guess.  And our syringes didn't come with the little cathither thing so I don't feel like I got all of the sperm sample out of the vial, just had to pour it into a cup and suck it up like that.  Now we know we need that and that we need to order much earlier.  

I'm not sure what we will do next month. We have a friend who will possibly we a donor for us that we need to have a serious talk with sometime before S's next ovulation.  Or maybe we order two or three vials and do the at home thing with frozen sperm again.  We will see.  

Monday, December 28, 2015

A New Plan, Home ICI

So we are done with the fertility doctor.  This is for a number of reasons, mostly cost, but also we are tired of fighting with him.  Tired of his attitude when S doesn't want to have a full to bursting bladder during IUI, tired of being bullied about taking fertility drugs, tired of trying to get in to see him when you never know how long you'll have to wait combined with S being busy at work.  Just tired of it.  So for now we are moving onto at home ICI.  We had originally thought that S would ovulate while we were in Oklahoma for Christmas and that we'd do an ICI using my brother as a donor.  But in the end he decided he couldn't do it because his girlfriend wasn't cool with it and also because of S taking the progesterone her cycle was late and so she didn't ovulate while we were there.  So onto a new plan.

We were going to just skip this month, but....we decided to go for it, but sort of half way.  We only ordered one vial of ICI sperm, which due to our last minute decision making is getting here tomorrow.  Today was only day 12 I believe for S so we ordered some supplies off amazon but those don't get here till Wednesday.  And of course that all means that S got her positive OPK today.  We are going to do our one insemination tomorrow afternoon when the vial gets here.  We have some preseed lube stuff which I've read good reviews of, a new oral medicine syringe, and some instead cups.  Hopefully we can make this stuff work because it's all I could come up with and waiting till Wednesday seems too late.  Fingers crossed for this first home attempt and that we don't totally screw it up!

Thursday, December 24, 2015

Merry Everything!

We are all snuggled down at my moms house, ready for Santa to come.  Hope you all are having a happy holiday!

Saturday, December 12, 2015

Still no

I think I am psyching myself out. I have all the pregnancy signs, but am currently on progesterone and my thyroid is a bit on the high side of normal. Hormones are funny and intense. I am nauseaus, boobs are larger and hurting a little, I am emotional and a little dingy. If u ask me, I am pregnant, but all tests (including one this morning) say no. Sigh. I am just so ready to be going down that path. I know Liz is too, but it feels like we might end up a 1 kid family. I am just fortunate to have one great kid. I think we will inseminate at home for 6 months and then decide from there what we think we want to do. I am tired of arguing with the dr. About a full bladder and waiting around. I can just pop home and do it and go back to work if we have sperm shipped to the house. We have our blood draw Monday, so we will know 100% then. Fingers crossed, but not feeling very hopeful. -s

Sunday, November 29, 2015

Try #5 IUI

Hi guys, it's been a while.  Mexico was great, we had a ton of fun.  Thanksgiving was good.  There, you are all caught up, haha.  No really it seems like not much has been going on.  Today we did our first of two IUIs for this cycle, which is try #5 for us.  We have a new donor and we got to have the nurse we like do the insem.  So no full bladder requirements, no stress as its Sunday, all smooth sailing.  Though we did have to take Jude with us.  He was good though and watched videos on our tablet during the whole thing.  At one point though he asked what the nurse was doing to moms butt (only he says it like bwutt). That was funny.  Also during the insem he was watching something with lots of truck noises and the nurse remarked how it sounded like the sperm were driving tiny trucks up to meet the egg.  And Jude told us no, it wasn't trucks but paw patrol vehicles.  So paw patrol to the rescue??  Tomorrow morning she will have IUI #2 before work.  I won't be able to go to that one and it will be with the Doctor instead of the nurse.  When we got pregnant with Jude I was only able to go to one of the two inseminations, so maybe...

I'm crossing my fingers that this is the one, but if it isn't we are still going to keep trying.  Next month we are going to my moms for Christmas and while we are there S will ovulate.  So we are thinking about doing an ICI.  One of my brothers volunteered to be our donor, which I think is really cool, and we didn't think we'd take him up on it but the timing will be right, so I don't see why not.  After that I think that S's mom is wanting to help us out finically as far as continuing to try.  Which I'm excited about.  How was everyone else's holiday, or at least those of you in the states?

Tuesday, October 27, 2015

The Known Donor Question

We have been talking a lot about what to do if our next two cycle attempts don't work out.  Finically unless there is some sort of windfall of cash, two more tries is it as far as the fertility doctor is concerned.  But we REALLY want another baby and so we have been thinking about other paths, which naturally leads to the idea of a known donor with at home inseminations.  We really don't want to use a total stranger for this, that's just too weird for us, but how to approach the known donor thing is weird too.  It's weird to brainstorm all of the men we know in the area and consider them.  We have two or three that we might consider.  But I'm not sure how to ask them.  Will it be weird if they say no? Will it be weird if they say yes?  Would it be better to just do ICIs at home with frozen sperm?  It would be more expensive but do able at least a few times.  And legally how complicated is a known donor?  I found a lawyer locally who does this sort of thing, but does the cost of the lawyer defeat the purpose of using a known donor?  Is someone who lives an hour and half/two hours away too far?  Is it too close for it to be someone S works with?  Is it too impersonal to send a Facebook message to the "candidates" seeing if they'd be open to it or does it need to be an in person conversation?  Any readers use a known donor?  I'd love to hear your experience!

Next week we go to Mexico!  I'm so excited!  We have decided to skip this cycle as S will probably ovulate like the day before we leave, which is not only too stressful, but also it would be annoying to not be able to drink on a vacation at an all inclusive just because of a TWW.  S would be SO mad to do that and then end up not pregnant.  I'm a little nervous about how things at the resort will work with Jude.  He is a picky eater and goes to bed by 7.  So I'm going to pack a ton of snacks that I know he'll eat and we will just have to do the best we can with playing it by ear in the evenings as to if we keep him up, one of us stays in for the evening or what.  No matter what though it's going to be fun and a well deserved break from work stress for S.

Monday, October 19, 2015

A Messed Up Cycle but a Fun Weekend

So we are guessing that by testing only in the afternoon that we missed S ovulating this month or she just didn't ovulate this month.  Not sure what happened there, but I think next month S will probably go back to testing twice a day again.  And randomly she started her period today, even though she is only on like cycle day 19 or 20, I think.  So weird and not like her.  Now I am not sure what is going on with this cycle and when we will next inseminate.  We have a trip to Mexico planned for next month and timing wise things were going to work out so that if we did inseminate then we'd know pregnant or not before we left.  Now, if she ovulates in two weeks like normal then it puts her in the TWW during our trio, which would be so annoying.  So skip this next cycle and not try again til December?  That sucks too.  

This weekend we went to the Texas State Fair and had too much fun and too much fried food.  We met S's dad and brother.  So the guys took Jude on the rides for the most part and I can't believe how brave he was.  Oh and he is still sleeping through the night, even on an air mattress at S's brothers house.  Crazy.  He gets his next toy reward tomorrow if tonight is another success and I think it will be. Now for some state fair pics.

Wednesday, October 14, 2015

Sticker Chart

Jude has always been a terrible sleeper.  He gets up a million times, he is hard to put to bed, he gets up early, he wants milk all night long.  And at 3 1/2 it's getting more than old.  Recently he has been getting up 1-3 times a night, which hasn't been too bad.  He just wants us to come in his room and lay with him for a minute or two and then he is back to sleep.  Sometimes it's because of a bad dream or something else scaring him but more often it is just out of habit that he calls out for us.  

So, to try to stop this on Sunday S made him a sticker chart.  The deal is that if he sleeps through the night and doesn't yell for us and stays quiet in his room until his bunny clock (which I really recommend if you have problems with a super early riser, basically you program it to show when the bunny should be awake and when he should be alseep) is awake the. He gets two stickers.  If he gets up just once he gets one sticker.  And for every ten stickers he gets a new toy.  So far it is working!!  I can't believe it.  The first night I was convinced was a coincidence, he had gotten the flu mist the day before which seems to wipe him out a bit.  But now it's been four days and he has slept all through the night every night but one.  And the night he got up it was only once and he was scared.  With how awesome he has been doing if he sleeps through the night tonight tomorrow he will have enough stickers to get a toy already!  S is a genius and I'm the most well rested I've been in YEARS, seriously.  

In TTC news we are still waiting for S to get the positive OPK.  Hopefully it will be today as she is on cycle day 15 or 16, I can't remember which.  The doctors office wanted her to just test in the afternoons so we are a little worried we missed it.  But you'd think you'd have a positive in the afternoon still, that it wouldn't be THAT easy to miss.  We will see.  

Saturday, October 10, 2015

Breath Holding Spell

On Thursday at Tball Jude had what doctors call a breath holding spell.  So scary!  He was at practice and they were running the bases as a group.  Around second base he tripped and fell and the kid running close behind him fell/stepped on him.  Ouch!  I could tell from the stands that he was hurt and started coming onto the field to comfort him when I saw that he was still down but not crying.  One of the coaches went to pick him up and set him on his feet and you could tell he was just limp.  So I run flat out to him and his face is red/purple and his lips are turning blue.  He isn't breathing and his eyes are rolling back in his head.  I grab him from the coach and slam him to the ground and start blowing in his mouth and hitting his chest, swearing the whole time.  I'm convinced he is dying, that's how frantic I was.  He comes to and starts crying, thank god.  One of the moms there is a pediatrician or pediatric nurse or something like that and she looks him over and he seems fine.  So we go home and he is fine but this is worrying.  He's done something like this twice before, once when he fell and once when he was just throwing a fit.  But both times it lasted like 20 scones and we were right there to get him breathing again.  So S called our pediatrician and we went in this morning with him just to be sure he was ok.  He has a slight heart murmur so we wanted to be sure that wasn't an underlying factor.  Anyway, they said it was a classic breath holding spell and that he was fine, it was just a scary thing some kids do, but they will be fine, it's not going to hurt them at all.  Whew!  Anyone else's kid scare the crap out of them this week?

Thursday, October 1, 2015

Fertility drug discussion again??

I called to tell the dr. I had started my period and would see him in 14-16 days for the IUI treatments. He had the nurse call me back and explain that he suggests a stronger treatment.  I thought we had this discussion already and I made it clear that I wanted to try naturally for a while, but apparently not clear enough. So...I am curious, how many unmedicated cycles did your dr let you do before trying to push drugs into it?  I want a few more. Really I want as many as I feel like without being bothered about my decision again.  We have done 3 unmedicated and 1 medicated try this round. Everything on ultrasounds looks good...eggs and uterus look how they should. I already did the dye test and it was normal.  I feel like it is just a matter of time.  Am I crazy to feel like doing them unmedicated should not be an issue??  How many times did your dr let you try without medication?

Wednesday, September 30, 2015

Another Day, Another Donor

Welp, we are done with September's cycle and moving onto October.  So I went ahead and ordered our vials of sperm for this cycle.  But we had to switch donors yet again.  Our new guy is out of stock and so we moved on to our back up guy.  This will be our 3rd donor to use TTC this baby, sort of crazy.  At least we arnt super stuck on one particular guy, it's not a real big deal, though obviously we did like the guy we used this month more than the one we will be using for October, as he is a back up.  I guess we keep picking popular donors with limited stock.  We could buy more than just the months worth that we need and thus avoid this problem, but that seems silly when we don't care that much.  We don't want to get stuck with extra vials and we don't want to pay for storage.  So hopefully this guy will last for a little bit or even more hopefully what we just ordered will be all we need. :)

Thanks for your comments about how long it took to conceive your children.  It's nice knowing there is still hope and that there were babies at the end of your struggles.  And hopefully that is how our story will end as well, with a happy healthy baby.

Sunday, September 27, 2015


Well, another one bites the dust. Another negative. I think we are going to give it a few more tries and possibly call it after that. Liz is a bit more optimistic about it than I am. On one hand, we have only tried 4 times this go round. We have been at this since January despite that. But, when do you call it quits? For now, we are going to try 2 more times and might stop after that. We both want a baby, but at what financial and emotional cost? We have an amazing son already, and our family is good with the 3 of us. We just always saw a family of 4, but maybe that will not be the case.  
Send us some baby thoughts and thank you for all the positive wishes you have already sent our way!

Friday, September 25, 2015

Maybe, Maybe Not

S thought about taking a pregnancy test this morning but decided against it, she didn't want to ruin her Friday by getting a negative and having to go to work.  So she will take the first test tomorrow.  And she feels like it will be a negative, that she is PMSing.  But she has been cramping on and off all week and the last two or three days has been having headaches.  Hat sounds sort of pregnant to me, but we don't remember if she was feeling that way last time with the progesterone or not.  I don't know, could go either way.  Ha, I suppose that's always the option isn't it? She is feeling a bit sad about it but without at least one negative test I still feel hopeful.  Cross your fingers that this weekend we get our BFP!

Monday, September 21, 2015

One Week Down, One to Go

We survived week one of our two week wait.  It seemed to go by quickly this time around, at least for me.  It's so hard to tell anything with S taking the progesterone, it just makes her feel totally pregnant!  Yesterday though I was getting some chicken to marinate for dinner and I left the empty marinade bottle on the counter.  S came over by it and asked why did it smell like Bloody Marys over there?  And she sniffed around til she figured out it was the empty marinade bottle, which was Jamacian Jerk flavored.  And like I could only smell what she was talking about when I picked up the bottle and held it under my nose.  But she has always had a strong olfactory sence so maybe it's nothing.  Either way, things feel calm, peaceful, and I think that we are both in a good place about it.  If she is pregnant, yay, and if not, oh well we will try again.  

Because of the progesterone though we pretty much have to wait for next Monday's blood draw to know one way or another.  Last time she took it she didn't start her period till she was off of it a day or two.  I'm sure we will do a home pregnancy test or two, but we have sort of decided it is easier to be disappointed once rather than over and over again, not to mention cheaper.  I've got my fingers crossed and hope you do too that this is it though!

And some pictures of Jude because it's been a while

Monday, September 14, 2015

September's IUIs

On Friday S got a faint positive on her OPK and then a strong positive early Saturday morning so we did our IUIs on Saturday and Sunday.  On the Saturday one we had to bring Jude with as it was a bit last minute.  Luckily for us he was really good and just played on the iPad during the appointment.  That is a very special treat for him so even though the whole thing took a while he didn't mind at all.  During the IUI our doctor has the full bladder approach and wants it to be full to press the uterus down and allow it to help gravity.  Problem with this as I've said before is that S has a super small, fast filling bladder and our doctor is soooooooooo slow sometimes.  This often leads to her getting to a good point but by time he is ready to go, she is far past that point.  So this time around she let him know that she wasn't willing to do it and that it'd just have to be a little full.  He pushed back on this some but in the end we compromised and she had a semi full bladder and the whole thing went well, no dire urge to pee or pain. Same story Sunday, semi full bladder, Jude at grandmas house and a smooth IUI. Both days our guys sperm count was a little above 16 million for motile sperm, so that's good.  On Saturday when we looked S had a nice big 24 cm folliciles ready to burst and so I'm thinking that our timing was really good.  I'm hopeful that this is the one.  And maybe it isn't, but man does it seem so much more relaxed and right without the craziness of the drugs.
Fingers crossed!!

Friday, September 4, 2015

Drug Free, so Put the Crack Up

A little Marky Mark for your Friday morning.  So, it's been a lot of radio silence around here while we took the month off from TTC.  I think it's been a really good thing for us.  S has settled into her new role at work and seems to have shaken the weight of all of those interviews and stress of change off her shoulders.  Our dieting and exercising has gone pretty well.  We have both lost over 10lbs at this point and are hitting the gym 4-5 days a week along with limiting sodas and booze (s has done better on the gym front and the booze front than I have).  So all in all we go into this cycle slightly healthier, less stressed, and with a touch more excitement for the the whole thing.

And we go into it drug free, which is such a relief.  We had an appointment with our doctor this week and we let him know that we wouldn't be using any fertility drugs going forward.  It's just too hard on us both and if you've been reading along, it's not like they have been all that effective for us anyway.  I was worried about his response to this, in the past he has advocated pretty strongly for us to use the drugs, but overall he was pretty cool about it.  All he really said about it was well you know it decreases your chances...but whatever you want to do.  

So the sperm is shipped and waiting at his office and we like this new donor better than our last one. We are using a new bank, NW Cryobank, which is just about half the cost of the pervious bank.  And without the drugs and monitoring, that part of things is also a whole heck of a lot cheaper.  So that gives us so hope that we could afford to try 2-3 more times drug free if we wanted to.  Obviously we are hoping that this month with this new donor is the one.  Now we just wait for that positive OPK, which should be in a little less than two weeks from now, maybe like a week and half.  Fingers crossed that this cycle is THE cycle!

Wednesday, August 12, 2015

Winners Please Email Me :)

Drum roll please!  The winners of the Aurorae towel and of the Aurorae candle are as follows:
Creating Our Own Destiny has won a purple towel and Pleasently Content has won a Healing candle!  Ladies please email me your full names and addresses to so I can get your prizes sent out!  Congrats!

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Giveaway and Review!

I was asked to review a few items again for Aurorae and since I enjoyed checking out their sling backpack I figured why not!  And I love being able to give stuff away to you guys, something I don't normally get to do.  I was asked to review their microfiber beach towel and one of their soy candles.

The towel is pretty awesome.  It is microfiber which means it is super absorbent.  We go to the pool a ton and I hate carrying around beach towels for everyone.  Three beach towels take up so much room!  But the Aurorae beach towel is super long and wide but thin, so it doesn't take up nearly as much room in my beach bag.  But that's not to say that it isn't a great towel, because it is.  It is really soft and feels fluffy and well made despite how thin it actually is.  And it comes in lots of pretty colors.  It also washed and dried without any problems.
The other thing I got to check out is a soy candle.  The candle I got sent was the Peace candle which is a tropical scent.  I'd describe the scent as being like a fruity, banana-y, suntan lotion sort of smell, which I liked.  It smells good and seems to burn really clean.  It is a subtle scent which is nice if you are sentistive to smells.  I personally like a really strongly scented candle so it was a bit too subtle for me, but I used it in my kitchen which opens into my living room, so it is a pretty big space.  It might seem stronger in a smaller space like a bathroom or bedroom.  

So, if you are interested in winning either of these items, leave me a comment below letting me know what color of towel you'd love and what scent of candle you'd enjoy.  I will draw a separate winner for each and email each winner to get their address.  Unfortunately this contest is only open to US residents.  Contest ends August 12th at 10am.  Good luck!!

Aurorae sells the best reviewed yoga mats, yoga apparel,and yoga and meditation accessories online. You can browse their yoga mats, yoga bags, yoga apparel and other yoga accessories here.


Monday, August 3, 2015


I just got a text from S, she isn't pregnant, just like we though.  She took a home pregnancy test on Friday and again on Sunday, so we were expecting today's to be negative.  Still a bummer though.  I think the timing was just off.  She thought that she ovulated like three or four days after the trigger shot instead of the 36 hours that you are supposed to.  And even if she hadn't I didn't think that the timing of the IUIs was very good anyway, we weren't sure why our doc did them at the times that he did.  Oh well, doesn't matter now.  

We talked about it yesterday and we are taking August off from TTC.  S starts a new position at work today and so she really doesn't need anything to distract her from that.  Also, we need to find a new donor, the one we were using is all out and after three failed cycles why not change it even if we didn't have to.  I found a different bank that looks to be about half the cost so now we just need to pick someone.  The rest of this month we are going to really focus on fitness and nutrition, try to loose some weight the both of us.  We figured it can't hurt.  I don't think we have it in us to try more than two, maybe three, more times before we are done with this roller coaster.  I hate feeling like our baby is slipping through our fingers, but money isn't endless and pretty much all of you know how hard this is emotionally.  So I think this month off will be really good for us both.  Just wish we didn't need it.

Friday, July 24, 2015

Allergic to Sperm?

Probably not, but S is sick and it seems like every time we do an IUI she gets sick immediately after.  Probably just a combo of living in Austin where allergies are crazy for everyone along with having a germy 3 1/2 year old in the house.  Jude was sick earlier this week so we think that is the bug S caught but hopefully she will be feeling better tomorrow.  He was only really sick for like a day but has a little cough and is super tired and has been all week.  In fact it is 7:30 on a Friday night and both my babies are already asleep in bed.  Fingers crossed at least I avoid it.

In pregnancy news, no news.  S has felt bloated and weird all week but it's hard to tell if it is anything other than the progesterone she is taking combined with being sick.  I feel good about this try being "the one" but of course that doesn't mean anything.  So keep thinking those sticky baby thoughts with me!

Monday, July 20, 2015

A Way Better IUI

This morning we had our second IUI and it went much better than yesterdays.  Still uncomfortable but not painful.  Of course S has a tiny bladder and she can't stand to feel like she has to pee so she only made it ten minutes of laying down afterwards instead of fifteen but oh well.  Lesson learned, S can either have a full bladder for the IUI or she can lay for fifteen minutes afterward but she can't do both a full bladder and lay for fifteen minutes.
Sperm count today was good.  Yesterday's was 15 million motile and today was 17 million.  Keep fingers crossed and what not as we now enter the two week wait!!

Sunday, July 19, 2015

IUIs Suck

We had IUI #1 this morning and while it was nice to get it done on the weekend when S isn't worried about work, it was not great.  Our doctor is a big believer in having a very full bladder during an IUI so that the pressure pushes your uterus flatter and apparently this makes everything easier/better.  That may be true, but it does not make thigs better if it is your bladder.  When we got there S was already feeling hydrated but not full and so we do an ultrasound and her bladder is not full.  Cut to 45 minutes later and 4 of those tiny bottles of water later and she is uncomfortable.  Add a pinching painful speculum, an ultrasound thing being pressed down super hard on the full bladder, a catheter going through the  cervix, and lots of jostling.  So needless to say it was a painful and unpleasant experience for S.  And I hate that.  I wish it had been more peaceful and relaxing.  I'm hoping tomorrow we can do wayyyyyy less water and make the whole thing easier to deal with.  Think sticky baby thoughts for us!!!!!

Saturday, July 18, 2015

Two Eggs Locked and Loaded

We had an appointment this morning to see how the folliciles were doing.  And yay, we had two mature folliciles!  One at 17 and one at 19.  And I think we had another at like 15 so there is a small chance for that one too but not likely.  So S will do the trigger shot tonight at 11pm and then do the IUIs tomorrow and Monday morning.  I'm so excited that for one the drugs did what they were supposed to this time and that we actually get to try this month.  We've been working at getting pregnant since the beginning of the year but this will only actually be our third try.  So let's all cross our fingers and think third times the charm!!

Thursday, July 16, 2015

Looking Good so far

S had an appointment for an ultrasound this moring.  And it looks like so far we have two, maybe three contenders for this month!  She had two folliciles on one side that were around a 14 and one that was a 13 and then a few smaller folliciles on the other side, 12s and 10s I think.  So fingers crossed that the next few days of shots produces three good folliciles so that this month will be a success!  We have another appointment Saturday morning to do another ultrasound and possibly trigger.  We are looking at possibly a Sunday/Monday insem or a Monday/Tuesday of next week!  I really really really hope that this month is our lucky month, so send us the good vibes please!

Wednesday, July 15, 2015


Amanda, you won the backpack!  I sent you an email but if you don't get it today please contact me.  Thanks for entering guys!

Wednesday, July 8, 2015

Aurorae Sling Backpack Review and Giveaway!!

I was recently given an Aurorae sling backpack to review for you guys.  I wasn't paid for my review but I was given the bag for free.

I've been using this bag for about two weeks now and even though it is technically a yoga bag, I use it as a diaper bag.  Or more accurately as a toddler bag for Jude.  Normally when I am out and about with Jude I have an extra pair of pants and undies just shoved in my purse along with some snacks and possibly a drink. And I know at least three different times now a sippy cup has somehow opened up and spilled inside my purse.  Ugh.  Just yesterday we were out and even though Jude doesn't really have accidents anymore, he still managed to pee on his underwear while sitting on the potty and so I got to put his wet undies wrapped in paper towels into my Michael Kors purse .  And it made me wish I had used my Aurorae sling backpack instead because it has a section in it that has a wet liner which would have been a far better place to store those wet undies.  So even though Jude doesn't really need a diaper bag anymore, he does need something.

This bag has worked out really well for us.  It has tons of pockets so that snacks don't have to end up in the same pocket as wet undies.  Its really durable and well made.  I really like how it wraps around your body and distributes the weight of what you are carrying so it isn't all pushing on one shoulder.  And because it is a backpack style it doesn't get in the way of holding Jude on my hip.  It has a mesh pocket on the side that is perfect for water bottles, sippy cups, bottles, whatever so that if they do leak or spill it isn't all over the inside where your phone or wallet would be.  The bag does have a cell phone pocket on the front of the strap, which I liked until my phone fell out of it.  I have an iPhone 5 and a pretty slim case so if you had something bigger you might not have the problem but I won't be putting my phone in there again!  I think it could be improved by having a snap or something to keep your phone from sliding out.  Another improvement I could see is that the zippers on the bag are all on the opposite side of what I would want.  I'd love to be able to just slide the bag around so that I could get into the pockets while wearing it, but where the zippers are now you have to take the bag off to get into anything without it being awkward.

The Aurorae sling backpack also makes a good gym bag and with how it holds a yoga mat I'm sure it makes for an awesome yoga bag, but I don't do yoga so I couldn't tell you anything about that.  So if you are looking for a bag to use with kids that is a little more practical and not totally girly or if you are looking for a great gym/yoga bag, check it out at or enter to win one of your own!

Contest is open to U.S. residents only!  Just leave a comment below telling me what color
you would pick if you were the winner! Contest ends on July 15th at 8:00 am central time.  Winner chosen at random and will be contacted by email.  Good luck!!

Aurorae sells the best reviewed yoga mats, yoga apparel,and yoga and meditation accessories online. You can browse their yoga mats, yoga bags, yoga apparel and other yoga accessories here.

Monday, July 6, 2015

Gearing up again

I know I've been totally absent from this space this last month.  I'm going to try to get back into it.  So just so,e quick updates to get the ball rolling.
-S has been taking birth control for the last three weeks to suppress everthing in hopes that we won't keep getting a bully egg sucking up the drugs.
-Birth control sucks and it has been a very hard three weeks, mostly for S.
-Last week we went in and she had a cyst on her left ovary.  Today we went back in and it was gone and so all things will move along. In a few days she starts the Fermara and then the Folistim.  We have another appointment on the 15th to see how things are progressing.
-Even if there is only one follicle we will still inseminate.
-Fingers crossed that this is the time and she gets pregnant.  But if not we have decided we are done with the drugs.  We will still try a few more times but it will be with just unmedicated IUIs.  It's just not worth all of the side effects.  And not to mention how hard it is to do all of the doctors appointments when she already has a demanding full time job.
-I have a product review and give away that I'm going to post later this week, so keep an eye out for that!

Monday, June 8, 2015

7 Years, No Itch

Yesterday was S's and mines 7 year wedding anniversary.  Wow, time does fly!  I am so lucky to be married to such a wonderful woman who does EVERYTHING for our family.  I love you baby!

Because my mom is in town visiting we didn't do anything romantic to celebrate.  Instead we did so,e hard manual labor.  No kidding!  We went to breakfast and we're talking about how we didn't know what we wanted to do with our day and I mentioned how I'd like the flower beds out front that were full of rocks to be dug out and planted.  So we powered up with coffee and went to town.  It was soooooo much more work than we anticipated.  I thought with the three of us we could get it down in a few hours but it actually took all day.  But it looks awesome!  Some before and after pics
Hard to tell, but along with this bush and some junky tree weeds growing in this bed there is also like six inches of gravel/railroad rocks.  Ugh, the people who owned the house before us must have two tons of the stuff in both the front and mostly back yard.  I hate it!
S working hard to dig up the six-eight inches of rock plus a few bricks buried in there
The beautiful after!
It looks even better in person and is going to looks so dang cute after I go get a new flowery wreath for the front door.

A sweet friend also got us an edible arrangement which was so yummy!
And my sweet mom got us a new gas grill!  The one we had she bought for our wedding present so it was really cute of her to get us a new one for our anniversary.  I love it!

Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Another Cycle Bites the Dust

This month has been busy and on top of my birthday, Mother's Day, visitors, and all the rest of life, we have been TTC.  This month S did the same Femara and injectables combo.  When we went in for the day 3 ultrasound one follicle was already bigger than the others so they cut the Femara down but kept everything else the same as there were two or three small follicles working on either side.  But when we went in for the ultrasound yesterday it showed one big mature follicle on one side and like two tiny unmatture ones on the other side.  So, cycle cancelled.  Again. Boo.

Our doctor is giving us another free "re-do" month next month.  We were tempted to go ahead and do the IUIs this month, especially as S's mom offered to pay for it, but ultimately we trust that the doctor knows what he is doing.  We'd rather spend the money she offered if we get to a point where we can't afford to go forward rather than taking a gamble on one follicle just because we are tied of this.  

So next month once S starts her period they are going to do two weeks of birth control pills and then do the fertility treatment.  I think that they are hoping to suppress the whole one big follicle thing and hopefully get things jump started after that.  Next month if we end up again with just one follicle we will go ahead and do the IUIs and then see where to go from there.  It's frustrating for S to have to take all of these drugs with the up and downs that go with them only to not even try to get pregnant, but I think it makes sense to take advantage of the "freebie" and skip trying.  Normally he only gives one free do over month, so he is being generous giving us two.

So ready for this part of having a baby to be over!

Friday, May 1, 2015

Cycle Cancelled, Boo

Well today our ultrasound appointment revealed that S had one bully follicle that soaked up all of the Follistim, leaving the others in the dust.  So after talking it over with our doctor we have decided to cancel the cycle.  The goal is to have at least two, if not three or four, follicles with the medications, so going ahead with just one would be a waste.  The nice thing is that they basically have the policy of if you have to cancel the cycle due to under or over stimulation they give you one "do-over" cycle for free that next month.  The really nice thing is that our doctor oddly enough cannot handle seeing someone cry and of course S was upset to have gone through taking the drugs only to have to cancel, so he is going to give us two "do-over" cycles if the same thing happens again next month, though hopefully it won't due to increaseing the Follistim.  And the Follistim did end up being a bit rough for her, lots of bloating, and feeling emotional, so she is not looking forward to doing that again, especially increasing it.  

While we were there they went ahead and gave her a trigger shot to get everything cleared out and onto the next cycle.  And after that we went out for a lovely dinner while grandma was at home with Jude.  Jude got a super cute haircut today so I leave you with his cute face.

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Ultrasound Egg Check

We went in this moring for a quick ultrasound to check S's progress with the drugs.  Everything appears right on track with one follicle measuring at 14, one at 12 and two around 10 (17 is considered mature).  Our nurse needs to consult with the doctor before calling us later today with the next steps but she guessed that he would have S take the Follistim shots for the next two days and then do another ultrasound on Friday.  If everything looks mature by Friday then possibly trigger and do IUIs Saturday/Sunday or Sunday/Monday.  Some pics of the growing follicles!
You can kind of see on these where the dark black spots are, those are the bigger follicles.
So now all they need to do is grow some more!

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Hooch and HootieHa

Today Jude told me that he wanted us to have two babies and that we should name them Hooch and HootieHa.  This kid cracks me up.

Monday, April 27, 2015

Day 4 Femara plus Follistim Shot

As stated in the title, today is day 4 of S taking Femara and additionally she did her first Follistim shot.  She still hasn't really had any side effects from the Femara,  today she felt a little bit moody and  hormonal, which we call feeling like "Period Girl" around here, but that's been it.  So not too bad.  Oh and I think she was a tiny bit crampy too.  Tonight she did her 75 unit shot of Follistim and she does another tomorrow before we go in on Wednesday for the ultrasound. That shot is a bit crazy.  We watched a video on how to do it, the same one the doctors office had her watch.  The shot comes with this weird shot pen thing that you have to clean and load and do the injection a certain way.  Nothing hard but a bit of a process.  She gave herself the shot while I was giving Jude a bath.  I don't think I could have given it to myself, even with the tiny needle, but it's what she wanted to do.  She reported afterwards that where she did it is a little sore but otherwise it was no big deal.  

So we will see on Wednesday how everything is looking.  We are hoping she will have two or three nice foliciles ready to become baby number 2.  Fingers crossed!

Saturday, April 25, 2015

Day 1 of Femara and Swim Lessons

S went in for the ultrasound yesterday and it still showed her lining as being on the thicker side, though she did start bleeding more yesterday.  The doctor decided to go ahead and have her start the Femara yesterday.  So she has taken it one day and so far so good.  She said it gave her a bit of a sour stomach for about an hour after taking it but that's all.  We will go ahead and have the ultrasound on Wednesday so hopefully things will be on track.

Yesterday I also took our dogs to the vet as they have been throwing up for about a week on and off.  Our dog Emma is fine but our pug Pedro they think has a liver infection.  Poor guy isn't doing well.  He is on two antibiotics and some anti nasua pills and gets his liver levels tested again in a week.  Hopefully the meds will help him and it doesn't turn out to be anything more serious.  You can tell he still doesn't feel well but he at least ate twice yesterday and kept it down so that's a step in the right direction.

This morning Jude has his first swim lesson!  Texas is full of pools and we love to go swimming so it's important to me that he learns how to swim plus we already loves the water.  He did really well today and we were so proud of how well he listened to his teacher and tired to do everything she asked,  here are some cute pics from this morning.
Isn't he soooo cute??

Thursday, April 23, 2015

The Plan

S went in this morning for her cycle day 3 ultrasound and to get the info/drugs for this months attempt.  I wasn't able to go this time, I had a CT scan scheduled for the exact same time that I had to go to.  It sounds like I missed a bunch of info!  But we have a plan and I'm excited.  Today during the ultrasound S's lining was on the thick side as she has had a light period, so they have her scheduled to come in tomorrow morning to check it again unless she has a heavy flow today.  Hopefully things will be all good and she can start taking the Femara tomorrow evening. They have her taking 5mg cycle days 4-8, so for five days with a 75 lu of Follistim injection on day 7 and 8.  Then she is supposed to have an ultrasound on the 29th, cycle day 9, to see how things have progressed.  Fingers crossed everything will be right on track and then we will get instructions on when to do the trigger shot and when to schedule the IUIs.  Crazy!

During the visit they showed her a video of how to do the injections, sounds sort of complicated.  After my hysterectomy S had to give me daily injections for like two weeks, I can't remember what it was for, and it wasn't too bad so we have some experience with it.  All the same I'm not looking forward to having to give her those shots.  

Anyone reading ever use Femara?  Any stories to share?

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Let's Get This Party Started

S started her cycle today which means we are on day 1 of trying to concieve!  This month has crawled by, waiting for things to get moving again.  We are still appealing the decision of our insurance to deny our already approved coverage, so no news on that front.  So we are going to pay whatever we owe the fertility clinic if they can ever figure out how much that should be and we are going to go ahead totally out of pocket at this point, which is fine.  So S goes in for a baseline ultrasound on Thursday which I will unfortunately have to miss due to having a CT scan that same morning (normal post Cancer monitoring CT scan so nothing new there).  When she goes in I'm guessing they will give her the Femara/Femara perscription along with whatever else she needs and instructions on exactly what we need to be doing drug wise.  I know it's not going to be fun for her to be taking all of this stuff but we are still excited to be doing this.  Excited that this might work and be the try that we get our BFP.  They say third try is the charm, right?  That's a thing.  So fingers crossed and all that jazz!

Sunday, April 5, 2015

Happy Easter!

We arnt a religious family but we do love holidays so Jude got the full Easter treatment.  He woke up to his Easter basket which he was so excited about.  Then he had an Easter egg hunt in the backyard.  That afternoon we had our closest friends and Jude's grandma over for a potluck, all of whom he loves and of course spoiled little boy got more Easter presents from everyone.  Then when it was clear he had too much sugar in his system to ever sleep we took him to a trampoline park which was awesome.  He had soooooo much fun today.  And I got some cute pictures, which is what it's really all about for me.
Just hanging around upside down with Grandma

It was a good day and a great weekend!

Tuesday, March 31, 2015

HSG Test

S got an HSG test done this morning.  The test basically is where they put a catheter through your cervix and fill everything up with contrast dye and then look at and where it goes through an X-ray.  Our doctor recommended it just to be sure that S didn't have any scaring due to her csection and gallbladder surgery.  S was really nervous about the test because we had been told by our doctor that it was a 5 on a 1-10 pain scale.  I'm happy to say that S didn't find it to be anything more than uncomfortable.  Also they didn't find any blockages, though when they were doing the test one side took longer than the other to spill out of the Fallopian tube.  Whole thing took about thirty minutes.  They wouldn't let me come back and be with her/watch but they did let me see a picture they took at the end, which is really cool of them.  You can see the little squiggles In the middle of the picture that is the dye coming out of the tubes.

On the insurance side we are trying to appeal their decision to deny our claim but it doesn't sound like it will work out.  Their policy about 12 failed cycles is pretty clear, we just didn't know about it because we trusted the doctors office to figure it out.  We will see what happens.  The doctor was able to code the HSG test as being related to a painful period so it would be covered.  We ended up paying under $200 for it so that's not bad.  And I think we have decided we are going to go ahead and do the next cycle with the full fertility drugs.  It makes the most sence to us.  So fingers crossed between the increased fertility from the HSG test and the drugs that May is our lucky month.  It was with Jude. :)

Thursday, March 26, 2015

Insurance Sucks

So, going to see the Doc wasn't much fun today.  First off he was an hour and fifteen minutes late.  That is just crazy, who has time to wait that long??  Then once they finally got us back they let us know that our insurance, Aetna, is denying our fertility coverage.  What?  On our very first visit the office called the insurance and told us that we had $3,500 worth of coverage and didn't need to do anything to qualify.  Now they are denying because S doesn't have any infertility issues, she just doesn't have a man, and so she will need to have 12 unsuccessful IUIs before we can get any coverage.  And sure enough that is what I found on their website is the policy for single women and gay couples and that heterosexual couples need to have tried on their own for a year.  So I'm guessing what happened is that the fertility doctor called our insurance, didn't mention we were a same sex couple, and were told we had coverage when if they had been more specific they would have realized that we do not have coverage.  On the one hand this is annoying because we might have done things differently if we knew we had no coverage.  On the other hand I think that our doctor will only end up billing us for the amount they are owed by our insurance which is considerably less than what we would have paid out of pocket.  Annoying as hell to hear either way.  We are going to call and try to fight it but after reading the policy on their website I'm not hopeful.  But we went into this thinking it would be 100% out of pocket so it's not the end of the world.

On to other things, we discussed fertility treatment moving forward.  Due to the insurance issues our doctor is wanting us to get the HSG blockage test done this month and skip this cycle.  I think that is what we are going to do as an April insem would end up being a Christmas baby and we don't want that and we might as well try to fight the insurance company.  What we will do for S's May cycle remaines to be decided.  One option is one last natural IUI.  The other option is doing Femara and injectables, which is what our doctor wants to do.  They have a package they do for $2,000 for out of pocket patients that covers the drugs and monitoring and IUIs if we went for the fertility drug path.  Luckily we have a month to decide.  S's mom was here watching Jude for us so I talked it over with her and she basically thinks that we should do at least one more natural IUI and that we have the money to do it and basically I'm pushing S to do the drugs when they aren't necessary.  I don't know, it's a gamble either way.  We have the money to do another natural cycle and then if that doesn't work to move onto a medicated cycle but money isn't unlimited.  I know lots of people, like you guys have said, do several IUIs un medicated and that two isn't really that many.  It's not that many, but at the same time S is 33, soon to be 34, and we have already spent over $3,000 on sperm alone.  And we just don't have the time and money to be doing more than 3 more cycles without tapping into the end of our savings.  I'm leaning towards one more natural IUI in May, but just one.  Then without a doubt moving onto meds.  But an hour ago I was ready to go full steam ahead with the drugs.  So I guess we will sleep on it and ultimately is it S's body and her decision. 

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

A Helpful Solution

If you have followed this blog for very long you probably know that my mother in law has some halariously bad suggestions.  Like when she suggested with Jude that we pick a donor who is tall because, and I quote, "people look up to tall people".  Or not to pick someone with a PHD because they have a poor work ethic and our child would be too smart and out whit us.  Thanks.  So today we were hanging out and i was telling her that our main objection to fertility drugs is the chance of multiples.  And she told me that if we did end up with twins she knows a really nice couple that really want a baby.  She said she bet they would do an open adoption so we could still see the baby.  Oh wow, no.  So much no.  At the time all I could say was no, if that happened we'd keep both babies.  Telling S about it we were cracking up about what a good deterrent to bad behavior it would be, like Jenny if you don't come here this instance I'll send you to live with the Nelsons like your twin brother!  And how would you pick which one to get rid of??  She cracks me up with her ideas sometimes.


S got her period last night, so it's a BFN.  Bummer, we really thought that this month was the one.  We have an appointment with our doctor on Thursday to see where we should go from here.  I'm guessing he will want to do the test where they make sure there arnt any blockages in the floapian tubes at the very least.  We want to discus if we should change donors or do anything else differently.  I think we are open to discussing fertility meds but not sure we are totally ready to do them.  We really don't want multiples.  It's hard to know what to do when everything seems to be totally fine.  Good sperm count, good lining, good egg, good timing, good everything.  So keep trying as is with the third times the charm mentality or move to more medical interventions?  Such a hard call.  Hopefully doc will have some insight because I'm really on the fence.  

S and I were talking last night about the BFN and how to add injury to insult, you not only find our you arn't pregnant but you also get your stupid period.  It would be so much better if someone came by with fresh cookies and a sorry not this month sign instead.  Ha!

Sunday, March 22, 2015

Breathing is harder than it seems

S and I are both miserable with allergies this weekend.  Not sure if it is spring, or all the rain, or something else, but we are both coughing and snotty and draining and yuck.  I've taken just about everything possible and still feel bad and poor S because she is possibly pregnant has to be really careful what she can take and thus feels even worse than I do.  Ugh.  And it has been raining the last few days but today was totally beautiful.  Of course we didn't get to enjoy it at all as we were inside suffering.
On the TTC note, S has thrown up twice now I believe and felt sick a bit of yesterday.  Today all sickness was allergy related.  She started taking pregnancy tests on Saturday, but nothing positive yet. Looking back on old blogs looks like we were wrong about when we got the BFP with Jude and it was actually day 13 of the TWW so that puts it at Tuesday if things stay the same.  Fingers crossed still!  We have our blood test scheduled for Thursday morning, so we will see.

Thursday, March 19, 2015

A Good Sign

After our last IUI we went on vacation and just got back yesterday.  It was super nice and relaxing, just hanging out with family.  Over all S hasn't had any symptoms, just a little cramping.  But this morons she threw up.  And she hasn't been taking the DHA, so it isn't from that.  Fingers crossed that this is a sign that she is pregnant!

Thursday, March 12, 2015

Another Awesome IUI

We went in and did our second IUI this morning.  Once agin we got the nurse we liked instead of the too rough and too Debbie downer doctor.  Don't get me wrong, we love our doctor, he is great.  But he has a pretty typical doctor attitude/poor bedside manner, which isn't pleasent when you are trying to be positive and relaxed.  Also, I think the nurse really likes us and thus does lots of ultrasounds for us.  So here is once again the egg before insemination, or at least were the egg was because S ovulated some time yesterday.  So what you are seeing is more the ovulation fluid and such.  So prefect timing there.
If you look back to yesterday's picture you can see how this one is slightly different.  And of course we have the pic from after placement, the sperm is again the little white spot next to the green plus sign.
Motile sperm count was good again today, about 13 million.  So now we start the dreaded two week wait.  I really really think that this is the lucky time, fingers crossed knock on wood.  Yesterday a coworker of S's who doesn't know at all that we are trying to get pregnant came up to her and said that she had a dream last night that S was pregnant with a little girl.  And this woman has never mentioned before having a dream about S.  Could it be a sign?  Also on the way to the gym this morning I heard the songs Crying by Aerosmith (babies cry), All the she wants is another baby by Ace of Base, and Don't worry Baby by the Beach Boys.  Also a sign possibly?
Please stick baby, please!

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

World's Best IUI

The deed is done!  We went in this morning for our first IUI for this cycle.  Our favorite nurse Becky did the actual insemination.  We love her because she has just the most positive sweet personality and she is so much gentler than the doctor.  Also, she is always on time and ready to go!  So we requested that she do tomorrow's IUI as well, which insures us two painfree, peaceful IUIs.  Beforehand we did an ultrasound to make sure there was a good looking, mature follicle.  Here she is in all of her glory, the chosen folicial, which is the black circle in the middle of the little green plus signs, which they use to measure it.
Everything looked perfect, great folicial, nice lush uterine lining, good sperm count (12.2 million motile sperm to be exact).  Becky even said that if this IUI doesn't work it will be one of those head scratchers as to why not.  And here is the after ultrasound of the sperm placement, which are the three little white dots in the middle and not just one big white spot like last time because they were already on the move before we got the ultrasound.  

I know it probably seems silly to take pictures of this stuff, but I just think it is so cool that we have pictures of both the egg and sperm that were used to concieve this baby.  How many people can really say that?
Sticky, sticky baby thoughts!

Today is THE Day!

S got a positive OPKS yesterday afternoon, so this morning will be IUIS #1 for this cycle. I feel like we are going into this round a little bit less stressed and with less hippie preparations- no moxa, no acupuncture, no fertility rocks, just us.  Which I don't think will be bad thing, but it wasn't a conscious thing, I totally didn't even think about it the moxa till yesterday.  Also S isn't going to be taking the DHA anymore.  We figured out in the last two weeks that it is what was making her so sick.  Hopefully that means that she won't be as sick this pregnancy as last, as she was taking that stupid stuff the whole time with Jude!  So send us happy, sticky baby vibes these next two days please!

On a related note, yesterday at the gym I was talking to my mother in law, who lives here, about the IUIs because she likes to know what's going on and because she is going to watch Jude for me during them.  Anyway, after we discuss the details she tells me that if at all possible S and I should "make love" after each one as having an orgasm helps you to get pregnant and helps you to relax.  Ew, so much ew.  When I got home I told S about her moms comments to which she replied that makes me never want to have sex again.  Totally.  Oh mother in laws.  Haha.

Thursday, February 26, 2015

Ready to Rock the Next Cycle

We went to see the doc today and they did an ultrasound on S and everything looks good.  Uterian lining was right on and there were cute little folicials on each side just waiting to grow and be our future baby.  They pulled her thyroid levels and we will hear back on that in a few days.  S is also going to not take her DHA pills for the next few days to see if that is what is causing the nasua.  If so we will have to find another DHA to use, can't have the little lady be sick all the time if we can help it!

I also went ahead and ordered our next round of sperm and got a sweet random 10% discount for ordering two vials (Fairfax if you are shopping around).  The nurse at the doctor was telling us that they had a patient this week whose vials didn't get there in time for her ovulation because of weather delays with the shipping, even after they put in it was a medical emergency and what not.  And the poor thing has been doing all of the monitoring and drugs and what not and it was all for nothing.  So they were like order your sperm now just in case.  Should be there Monday so I think we are covered.

Wednesday, February 25, 2015


It's not official till tomorrow if you count the blood draw as the final no, but S's Aunt Flo came to visit today, so I'd say that's a pretty big BFN for our first try.  It did seem like we'd be breaking some sort of record to have S be a double one hit wonder.  Tomorrow we are still going into see the doc and one of the things we are having him check is S's thyroid levels as they were adjusted prior to insemination and that might be what caused/is causing S to have so much nausea.  So the plan is to try again in March, same donor, same all natural (aka fertility drug free) approach.  Fingers crossed March is our lucky month because after that the doc wants to talk drugs and S really doesn't want to go down that road, mostly due to terror of having multiples!  Thanks for all your hopeful thoughts!

Monday, February 23, 2015

No News Yet

So Friday has come and gone and so have five pregnancy tests, all negative.  But, we still have hope.  Our blood draw isnt scheduled till this Thursday, so it's early still.  With Jude we didn't get a positive until day 13, which we haven't hit yet.  So fingers crossed that in the next three days we get a BFP!  I'm not really worried about it though, S continues to have nasua and feel out of sorts.  Good signs I think.  I know she is frustrated at the negative tests, but it's coming, I know it!

In other news Jude was sick throwing up all day Friday, and of course it started at a play date at a new friends house.  A new friend that we had never played with before, a new friends whose house we had walked to.  He threw up all over himself and me and then we got to walk home, fun.  Luckily it was only down the street so not too big of a deal and as was working at home so she helped a ton with the clean up of his continued throwing up.  Poor guy,mate seeing him feel so bad.  At least it was only one day and no fever, he was feeling fine Saturday but wouldn't eat anything and by Sunday was just about his normal self.

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Waiting till Friday

We are waiting till Friday to do our first pregnancy test.  This waiting game, the TWW, sucks.  I feel more and more like S is pregnant.  She has had tons of nasua and seems pretty darn tired most of the time, she has been cramping on and off and just feels different.  So it's really hard to wait, I want to know for sure!  I bought two different home pregnancy tests yesterday at the store for her to test with.  Now it's just a matter of waiting....

Friday, February 13, 2015


Even though I feel like to say it could jenks it, I am so happy right now.  Everything is as good as it possibly could be right now, and even though it can all change in the blink of an eye, I think it's important to recognize and celebrate the happiness, the gratitude.  In the last few years there were times when I thought I might be bed riden for the rest of my life, times when I couldn't even sit up or walk, times when money was tight and I didn't know if we'd ever be able to try to have another baby, times when I thought I might die, times when I thought I might lose everything, times when I thought I'd never be pain free again. And now all of that is behind me.  
πŸŒ€ I'm the healthiest I've been in ages- I'm not stuck in a bed, I can walk and play with Jude and I'm pain free.  
πŸŒ€ I've been Cancer free over a year now.  
πŸŒ€ I have a wonderful, beautiful wife who takes such good care of me and our family, who always puts us first, work works her butt off so we can have everything we need and want.  
πŸŒ€ And that wonderful wife of mine might just be pregnant with our second baby.  
πŸŒ€I have an amazing three year old who makes me laugh everyday and everyday melts my heart with his sweetness.  
πŸŒ€I live in a great house in a great city with so many lovely friends, friends who are family to me.  
πŸŒ€It's starting to look like spring here and that makes me so happy.
πŸŒ€ I'm sure I could list a lot more things and that is a blessing, to have so many things to be happy for that you can't possibly list them all.
What are you all grateful for right now?

Thursday, February 12, 2015

IUI #2

We did IUI#2 this morning.  It was less ideal than yesterday's with the nurse.  Our doctor always always always runs late.  It's annoying, but I get that what he does is time sensitive and hard to schedule.  Today was no exception.  We got to the office around 10:15 for our 10:30 appointment.  For the insemination they want your bladder to be full, it helps with alignment.  So S is already pretty full of liquids and is finishing a bottle of water in the waiting room.  By 10:30 she needs to pee but knows she can't.  It isn't till 11:00 that they bring us back and by then she is so uncomfortable that she goes and pees just a little.  The nurse does an ultrasound on her bladder to make sure it's full enough and is like whoa, you are full, are you going to be ok?  S says she will be ok as long as the doctor doesn't take another twenty minutes to come back.  Well, nurse is like go ahead a pee a bit more.  Doctor finally comes by at 11:15, does his thing, which this time really really hurts poor S, has no bedside manner, basically says we will discuss drugs next month, and leaves.  So she has another 15 minutes of waiting after the insemination before she can go pee, which is torture.  For the first few minutes we try to relax to the soothing music and hold hands but then S is so needing to pee that we watch Bad Lip Reading NFL 2015 on YouTube on my iPad to pass the time along with another Bad Lip Reading video (which are really funny if you haven't seen them btw).  Oh and our sperm counts were even higher today, 36 million if I remember correctly.  

Even if today's IUI wasn't perfect, we are convinced it was just for fun anyway and that S got pregnant yesterday.  All yesterday she felt a tiny baby bloat and lots of little cramps and does today as well.  This afternoon she has been feeling queasy and even thew up, which could be unrealated but you never know.  After all, with Jude S felt differences in her body pretty much right away.  She is very sensitive and can always tell when she ovulates too.  So we begin our two week wait, we come in for the blood test on 2/26.  Fingers crossed, good juju sent, positive thinking, all that good stuff please send!  Pregnant til proven otherwise PUPO!!

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

IUI #1

Like I expected, S ovulated yesterday afternoon (I made her do a random afternoon test) and so we went into do the IUI this morning.  First they did an ultrasound to make sure the follicle was the right size and on its way.  The  nurse showed us how on S's left side there was a perfect follicle waiting to go and that her lining was also exactly what it needed to be.  So we went grocery shopping for 30 minutes (randomly) while they defrosted the sperm and did the count.  When we came back we had a whopping 25 million sperm ready to get to work.  So the IUI was pretty perfectly timed and we go back in tomorrow at 10:30 for IUI #2!
Oh and a random thing they did was do a quick ultrasound after the insemination to show the sperm placement.  If you look the picture it is the white spot above the green cross.  Weird, right?  Baby's first picture.
Think sticky baby thoughts!  We are optimistically referring to S as two weeks and one day pregnant (bc you start counting from the start day of your last period).

Tuesday, February 10, 2015

3 Year Check Up

This morning Jude had his 3 year check up, which went great.  He is 36.5 inches tall and 29 lbs, which put him in the 26% for his age.  So still small but growing at a perfect rate and defiantly not too small.  Doctor says everything is pretty perfect about him, he is right on track for physical and mental stuff and didn't have any concerns.  I expected as much, but it is always nice to hear.  He did have to get a flu shot, which of course he hated, but nothing to do about that.

On the TTC front, we are on pins and needles waiting for S to ovulate.  It should be tomorrow, could have been today but no luck there.  If she doesn't ovulate tomorrow, and I'm pretty sure she will, then her cycle is off a little, probably due to the stress she is under at work along with having her thyroid meds adjusted.  Fingers crossed that she will ovulate the most perfect, sticky little egg tomorrow and that our IUIs will be perfectly timed for us to have the baby that is meant to be ours!

Thursday, February 5, 2015

Van Goo Goo Art

Just wanted to let you all know I'm cleaning out my etsy store to make way for new paintings.  Everything is more than half off for the rest of the month, nothing over $15!  Check it out at

Monday, February 2, 2015

Happy Birthday Jude!

Three years ago today the most life changing, scary, wonderful thing happened- my sweet baby boy Jude was born.  Time goes by so fast and he is growing up even faster.  Before I had kids, despite having younger brothers, I had no idea what a three year old would be like.  I figured they could walk and talk some, but for the most part they would be babies, toddlers at best, not kids.  I was so wrong, Jude is in no way a baby anymore and he isn't a toddler either.  He is a kid, a little kid sure, but a kid all the same.  And he is delightful.  The way he laughs and squeals when he is happy or thinks something is funny, well there is nothing like it.  He is so funny!  And so very very sweet.  Also stubborn, obnoxious, and a terrible sleeper.  He is so very loveable, I can't hardly imagine my life without him.  Happy birthday Jude!
Our first family picture, right after Jude was born.
One week old
1st birthday
2nd birthday 
3rd birthday

On Saturday we had his birthday party.  He has been asking for Lightning McQueen cupcakes so we had Cars themed party.  It was so much fun and he had such a blast.  This morning on his actual birthday we suprised him with a radio flyer bike and are going to Chuckie Cheese for dinner.  He is so spoiled!  Party pics:

Requested cupcakes.  So good!
Three candles
Opening way too many presents
Proud, happy Mommas