Another Day, Another Donor

Welp, we are done with September's cycle and moving onto October.  So I went ahead and ordered our vials of sperm for this cycle.  But we had to switch donors yet again.  Our new guy is out of stock and so we moved on to our back up guy.  This will be our 3rd donor to use TTC this baby, sort of crazy.  At least we arnt super stuck on one particular guy, it's not a real big deal, though obviously we did like the guy we used this month more than the one we will be using for October, as he is a back up.  I guess we keep picking popular donors with limited stock.  We could buy more than just the months worth that we need and thus avoid this problem, but that seems silly when we don't care that much.  We don't want to get stuck with extra vials and we don't want to pay for storage.  So hopefully this guy will last for a little bit or even more hopefully what we just ordered will be all we need. :)

Thanks for your comments about how long it took to conceive your children.  It's nice knowing there is still hope and that there were babies at the end of your struggles.  And hopefully that is how our story will end as well, with a happy healthy baby.

-Liz 

Bfn

Well, another one bites the dust. Another negative. I think we are going to give it a few more tries and possibly call it after that. Liz is a bit more optimistic about it than I am. On one hand, we have only tried 4 times this go round. We have been at this since January despite that. But, when do you call it quits? For now, we are going to try 2 more times and might stop after that. We both want a baby, but at what financial and emotional cost? We have an amazing son already, and our family is good with the 3 of us. We just always saw a family of 4, but maybe that will not be the case.  

Send us some baby thoughts and thank you for all the positive wishes you have already sent our way!

-S

Maybe, Maybe Not

S thought about taking a pregnancy test this morning but decided against it, she didn't want to ruin her Friday by getting a negative and having to go to work.  So she will take the first test tomorrow.  And she feels like it will be a negative, that she is PMSing.  But she has been cramping on and off all week and the last two or three days has been having headaches.  Hat sounds sort of pregnant to me, but we don't remember if she was feeling that way last time with the progesterone or not.  I don't know, could go either way.  Ha, I suppose that's always the option isn't it? She is feeling a bit sad about it but without at least one negative test I still feel hopeful.  Cross your fingers that this weekend we get our BFP!

-Liz 

One Week Down, One to Go

We survived week one of our two week wait.  It seemed to go by quickly this time around, at least for me.  It's so hard to tell anything with S taking the progesterone, it just makes her feel totally pregnant!  Yesterday though I was getting some chicken to marinate for dinner and I left the empty marinade bottle on the counter.  S came over by it and asked why did it smell like Bloody Marys over there?  And she sniffed around til she figured out it was the empty marinade bottle, which was Jamacian Jerk flavored.  And like I could only smell what she was talking about when I picked up the bottle and held it under my nose.  But she has always had a strong olfactory sence so maybe it's nothing.  Either way, things feel calm, peaceful, and I think that we are both in a good place about it.  If she is pregnant, yay, and if not, oh well we will try again.  

Because of the progesterone though we pretty much have to wait for next Monday's blood draw to know one way or another.  Last time she took it she didn't start her period till she was off of it a day or two.  I'm sure we will do a home pregnancy test or two, but we have sort of decided it is easier to be disappointed once rather than over and over again, not to mention cheaper.  I've got my fingers crossed and hope you do too that this is it though!

And some pictures of Jude because it's been a while

September's IUIs

On Friday S got a faint positive on her OPK and then a strong positive early Saturday morning so we did our IUIs on Saturday and Sunday.  On the Saturday one we had to bring Jude with as it was a bit last minute.  Luckily for us he was really good and just played on the iPad during the appointment.  That is a very special treat for him so even though the whole thing took a while he didn't mind at all.  During the IUI our doctor has the full bladder approach and wants it to be full to press the uterus down and allow it to help gravity.  Problem with this as I've said before is that S has a super small, fast filling bladder and our doctor is soooooooooo slow sometimes.  This often leads to her getting to a good point but by time he is ready to go, she is far past that point.  So this time around she let him know that she wasn't willing to do it and that it'd just have to be a little full.  He pushed back on this some but in the end we compromised and she had a semi full bladder and the whole thing went well, no dire urge to pee or pain. Same story Sunday, semi full bladder, Jude at grandmas house and a smooth IUI. Both days our guys sperm count was a little above 16 million for motile sperm, so that's good.  On Saturday when we looked S had a nice big 24 cm folliciles ready to burst and so I'm thinking that our timing was really good.  I'm hopeful that this is the one.  And maybe it isn't, but man does it seem so much more relaxed and right without the craziness of the drugs.

Fingers crossed!!

-Liz 

Drug Free, so Put the Crack Up

A little Marky Mark for your Friday morning.  So, it's been a lot of radio silence around here while we took the month off from TTC.  I think it's been a really good thing for us.  S has settled into her new role at work and seems to have shaken the weight of all of those interviews and stress of change off her shoulders.  Our dieting and exercising has gone pretty well.  We have both lost over 10lbs at this point and are hitting the gym 4-5 days a week along with limiting sodas and booze (s has done better on the gym front and the booze front than I have).  So all in all we go into this cycle slightly healthier, less stressed, and with a touch more excitement for the the whole thing.

And we go into it drug free, which is such a relief.  We had an appointment with our doctor this week and we let him know that we wouldn't be using any fertility drugs going forward.  It's just too hard on us both and if you've been reading along, it's not like they have been all that effective for us anyway.  I was worried about his response to this, in the past he has advocated pretty strongly for us to use the drugs, but overall he was pretty cool about it.  All he really said about it was well you know it decreases your chances...but whatever you want to do.  

So the sperm is shipped and waiting at his office and we like this new donor better than our last one. We are using a new bank, NW Cryobank, which is just about half the cost of the pervious bank.  And without the drugs and monitoring, that part of things is also a whole heck of a lot cheaper.  So that gives us so hope that we could afford to try 2-3 more times drug free if we wanted to.  Obviously we are hoping that this month with this new donor is the one.  Now we just wait for that positive OPK, which should be in a little less than two weeks from now, maybe like a week and half.  Fingers crossed that this cycle is THE cycle!

-Liz